Masala Chai and a confession
After the lectures, one day, as per our ritual, we went to hang out at a tea stall nearby.
After an initial chit chat, many of us went their ways leaving me and him alone in the tea stall. He ordered me another tea for he knew my eternal love towards masala chai. We waited for my chai and his coffee to arrive and I suspiciously found him nervous. I wondered what is up with him that’s making him buy me chai along with a bit of excitement showcase.
I decided to wait for him to open up than making him more nervous than he is, by asking him about whatever it is. As I sipped my chai to savor the blast of cardamon and other strong spices, he looked at me with a grin.
“I have something to tell you, girl! Don’t get crazy about this, okay? Just stay calm and composed. But before that, do you have any wild guesses about what type of bomb am I gonna drop on you today with this masala chai of yours?” He asked jokingly watching me sipping the tea.
“Did you do drugs or something? Wait, I think you have a girlfriend, don’t you? Did you find someone on your dating app?” I tried my luck in the guessing game. But there wasn’t any hope for my stupid guesses.
“Well, don’t freak out, I have a boyfriend, not a girlfriend!” he said watching me keenly to see how would I react to this.
“Is this a prank or something?” I asked him as I knew how he loves to counter prank me every time.
He shook his head in disapproval. I suddenly felt proud and happy for I realized it takes a lot of courage to embrace yourself and tell it to someone else. I felt so much of emotions at that specific moment that I got numb!
What he said wasn’t something abnormal but the normal in our society is so outdated that I felt protective of him.
“Initially, I was very bewildered and fallen, I didn’t know what to do about my feelings which were quite different than other boys of my age. I felt troubled by my thoughts. I felt that people might see me as an alien for the way I feel. I didn’t know how to confront them at first. Then I thought if I don’t accept myself then how can I expect others to be accepting me the way I am?” He looked at me.
“I understand you, did you tell your family about this?” I enquired.
“I will, eventually. I need preparations for that. I hope they understand. We live in a society where a woman can’t be herself just for the sake of the normal norms specified by a patriarchial society, So I felt quite reluctant to accept the way I am. But now I guess this isn’t a foreign thing to discuss.” He said to me
“Have you ever suppressed yourself just for the sake of the society? Just because your society isn’t welcoming about the way you are? I lived that life till now. When I confessed to you, I felt as if I started to breathe. Someone in the world knows the real me, raw and pure.”
His words made me sit and think about how wrong things are around us, how unfair has been the fair in our social world for ages.
“I don’t know from where I gathered the courage to tell you this. But trust me, I feel alive. I feel happy when I say that I am different or unique. I know this is not wrong, it’s just distinct than the normal which isn’t right either as per me.” He looked at me in peace for he was happy with the way I reacted, I guess.
I smirked at him as he told me about his boyfriend and their story of the romance. Well, it’s normal I guess or else I will help him to change the definition of normalcy.
“Do you like it if any of the spices dominate your Masala Chai?” he asked me. ”Of course no! That would ruin the entire taste. All the different spices should blend so that there is an equilibrium of flavors obtained.” I said to him.
“No wonder that the taste of our society is so toxic, they don’t have this equilibrium thing I suppose”, he looked at me and we shared a good laugh!
